


East of Eden

by quinship



Category: Tegan and Sara (Band)
Genre: Anal Sex, Boot Worship, Dubious Consent, F/F, Gags, Genital Torture, Hair-pulling, Humiliation, Impact Play, Masochism, Mentions of Past Punishments, Not Safe Sane and Consensual, Rope Bondage, Sadism, Strap-Ons, Watersports, belt spanking, blowjob, clothespins
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-20
Updated: 2018-12-20
Packaged: 2019-09-23 07:09:30
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 14,506
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17075717
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/quinship/pseuds/quinship
Summary: Sure, Sara's game of cat and mouse with Tegan is cruel and sadistic... but Tegan likes it. Especially since she's desperate for any ounce of attention from her twin, even if it puts her through all sorts of pain.





	East of Eden

**Author's Note:**

> So..... Happy 7th day of ficmas. First off, i would like to apologize for this fic and i would like to HIGHLY encourage everyone to please READ THE TAGS and continue at your own discretion. Um... i wish i could issue a formal apology to TnS for what is done to Tegan in this fic, and to Sara for how she's portrayed because she is just a terrible person and utterly irredeemable. Also to Lindsey because... hoo boy this fic does not do her any favors either. Second, i would like to make it perfectly clear that i do not condone the actions in this fic at all. I believe in affirmative consent and that one should always follow Safe Sane and Consensual in all sexual encounters. Third, I know you may be wondering why i wrote this if i am so horrified by the contents. Well, i read an article about the rumored relationship between Marlon Brando and James Dean... And i was intrigued by the dynamic... and i couldn't help but think about applying the dynamic to TnS. Terrible, almost sociopathic people can be fun to write in a way. 
> 
> Thank you to my friends who were so supportive when i was struggling to write this. <3

Tegan hugged herself as she leaned against the lamppost. It might as well have been ice for all the warmth it provided. Her cotton hoodie was all that protected her from the cold and rain, but if things went the way she hoped, soon she would be inside and the jacket would lay forgotten on the floor. If she didn’t remain optimistic, she wouldn’t be able to take these conditions and just give up. So her eyes remained glued on the penthouse windows at the top of the building. Hours had ticked by since the occupant and her guest passed Tegan, ignoring her as they went upstairs, talking and laughing together. But it was ok… Tegan knew she‘d eventually be rewarded for her patience. Even if it wasn’t tonight… Sometime soon.

Her stomach rumbled. She’d been so focused on figuring out what _they_ did that she forgot to eat anything, instead just holding a beer as she watched _their_ outing. She’d taken a few sips of the beer, but soon forgot it was a beverage rather than a prop. She was getting near weak with hunger, but she knew if she just waited a little longer… It would be worth it. At least she hoped.

A window scraped open, echoing in the quiet street with the only other noise being the gentle flush of rain falling.

“Look, I told you she’d still be down there.” Sara’s obnoxiously smug voice drifted down to Tegan’s ears. “See? Right next to the lamppost. She’s watching us, hoping with everything in her little heart I’ll invite her up. What do you say?”

Tegan’s heart lifted, beating rapidly the second she heard her sister’s voice. She quivered when the window slid shut again and she couldn’t hear the answer, a frustrated whimper escaping her. She was like a drug addict waiting outside her dealer’s house, wondering if she’d be allowed to buy… or if she’d just have to watch others’ satisfaction instead.

Her phone vibrated in her pocket, and Tegan almost tore the fabric of her jeans as she scrambled to read the text.

_Sara: Be up here in five minutes or don’t bother coming up at all slut._

She’d get her fix after all! Her heart beat faster but Tegan couldn’t get her legs to work fast enough as she dashed to the doors, punching in the code she knew forward and backward. The doors unlocked and she scrambled across the lobby to rapidly press the button for the elevator as though that would call it down sooner. But she needed to make it up there in time… she had to. Tegan almost cried in relief when the elevator came quickly, and she hit the button for the top floor, desperation flooding through her, praying nobody would delay her. Thankfully, it was apparently too late for anyone else to go up, so Tegan got a direct route to the penthouse floor. She jetted out of the elevator the second the doors opened—too slowly for her tastes—and rapped against the door with her knuckles twice, holding back because she’d been turned away for knocking too desperately, and she didn’t know if she could take being ordered to go home.

The door opened to reveal Sara still fully dressed in a tailored suit. This planted a seed of dread in Tegan’s gut. Sara hadn’t had her fun yet, meaning Tegan might not get what she wanted most tonight. That thought made Tegan want to cry. But anything Sara gave her was better than waiting outside. And seeing her in a suit let her arousal bloom.

“Aw, she’s out of breath!” Sara observed, her tone condescending and mocking. “Just how eager were you to come up?”

Tegan didn’t answer that. She was forbidden from speaking unless prompted to do so. She just hung her head, entering when Sara grabbed her by the arm and roughly pulled her into the apartment, making Tegan stumble as she tried to keep her balance. The door practically slammed shut and there was the click of the deadbolt accompanied by the gentle scratch of the chain lock. She stood where her momentum left her, knowing Sara would be cross if she did anything without permission.

“Go greet our guest in the living room. You wouldn’t want to be rude, would you?” Sara went to the kitchen, probably to get more ingredients for the bar setup she usually had. She didn’t even grant Tegan a hungry gaze, or a comment on how much she loved seeing how desperate Tegan was to even wait in the rain… She wanted Sara’s attention, no matter how she received it. And Sara knew that

Tegan knew who Sara’s guest was, but if she let herself process that fact along with what was to come, she might cry. It was easiest to focus on Sara because that was somehow less painful than the person her sister chose for assistance in tormenting Tegan this time.

“Hello, Tegan.”

She flinched. She’d only heard that malicious tone in this voice once before… During their breakup. It had been months, and apparently, Lindsey still wasn’t over it. But Tegan had to be honest with herself: this entire situation, and whatever Sara had in store for her, was better than waiting outside in the rain. She would gratefully devour the crumbs Sara dangled in front of Tegan’s face for her own amusement. Just as long as Tegan didn’t starve.

“Wow, Tegan… It’s awfully rude of you not to say hello back to my guest.” Sara warned from the kitchen.

“Hi, Lindsey.” She mumbled, hugging herself, letting her wet hair plaster itself against her face, hoping it would shield her from having to look Lindsey in the eyes. But apparently, _they_ had other plans.

“Tegan, Tegan, Tegan, what would your mother say?” Lindsey’s sickly sweet voice tsked at her. She sighed, shaking her head from the seating area, where two couches faced each other, a coffee table between them with a wine bottle on top. “Sara, she’s just being so rude.”

“Forget what our mother would say or do, it’s me she should be worried about.” Sara’s voice traveled closer and the glass coffee table clanked with a tray plunked down on it. And then Tegan’s hair was yanked back, making her cry out in pain, her scalp stinging. Her gaze landed on the ceiling, the lights overhead burning her wide eyes. “Tegan, don’t be rude to my guest. Look her in her eyes and greet her the proper way. Best give her a handshake too. If you don’t behave, I will kick you out so Lindsey and I can enjoy our night together after that _lovely_ dinner.”

Tegan’s lips trembled as Sara released her hair. She took a deep breath and made eye contact with her ex-girlfriend, wishing the tears would blind her. Lindsey was dressed in slacks and a nice blouse with high-heeled boots. She looked so beautiful, except her eyes blazed hatred at Tegan.

“Good evening, Lindsey. It’s nice to see you again.” Her voice trembled even after she tried to swallow her fear, but she stuck out her shaking hand, and they shared a handshake that crushed Tegan. God, she wished her tears would blind her.

“That wasn’t so hard, was it?” Sara sat down next to Lindsey. “Now, Tegan, you’re rather underdressed. Ripped jeans and a hoodie? Old dirty sneakers? I don’t know how they let you into the restaurant. Get all of that off.”

Lindsey smirked.

This was Emy’s breaking point when Sara brought her into it.

_“I don’t care what you and your sister do together, but I just can’t be part of this! It’s fucked up and borderline cruel. Call me when you’re ready to leave me out of it. Tegan, do you need a ride home?”_

That night, months ago, Tegan declined the offer. She knew Sara was angry, but she wanted to feel Sara’s fury. But apparently Sara talked her way out of trouble, and now she and Emy were Facebook official. Tegan knew to stay away when Emy was over, because Sara legitimately didn’t want her around and all of this would stop if Tegan fucked things up for Sara with Emy.  

Lindsey clearly wasn’t Emy. So Tegan moved to the side (their gaze followed her) and unlaced her sneakers, shoving her socks inside. She dropped her damp hoodie to the ground. Next came her T-shirt and jeans.

Harsh laughter came from Lindsey. “She’s trying to impress you… A matching lace underwear set. Very uncharacteristic, but a step up from those ugly sports bras and boxers.”

“Too bad it won’t work,” Sara replied coldly, pouring herself more wine. “Get those fucking things off, Tegan. I can’t believe you can’t even strip correctly… Leaving your clothes in a pile…” She scoffed.

Tegan’s lip wanted to tremble, but she stepped out of her pants and pushed the black boyshorts down her legs. She knew what Sara really wanted gone; saving the bralette for last in hopes it served as a grand finale.

“Hmm… What can we make her do to entertain us…” Sara hummed unimpressed, making Tegan feel like a popped balloon. “Get over here, Tegan.”

Tegan’s instincts screamed at her to get dressed and go home because Lindsey was there, but if Sara wanted to give her something; anything, Tegan would take it. She knew she’d like it, to a certain degree. So she walked over to Sara and Lindsey, standing before them naked.

“Get that hair out of your face.” Lindsey wrinkled her nose. “You still look like a giant mess. It’s killing the mood.”

“I usually like it when she looks pathetic,” Sara commented. “But you’re the guest…”

Tegan took that as a signal to try smoothing her hair down and get it out of her face. She used the rainwater, hoping it would stick. At the very least, she tucked part of her hair behind her ears. That had to be better.

“I bet she didn’t even eat dinner tonight.” Sara grinned, turning to Lindsey. “The second I told her I was going out with someone, she probably rushed over here and just stood outside waiting. And then followed us to the restaurant. She’s so desperate she neglects her own needs… We should probably feed her.”

In response, Lindsey picked up a chocolate-covered almond from the dish on the tray and dropped it on the floor. “There, have something to eat.” She crossed her arms over her chest.

Tegan frowned, turning to Sara with pleading eyes, but her sister only raised an eyebrow as if daring her to refuse. She got down on the ground and ate it off the hardwood floor, knowing better than to use her hands.

“If I see any chocolate stains on my clean floor, you will be cleaning it up,” Sara warned before passively taking a sip of wine.

Lindsey made Tegan eat chocolates off the floor and lick up the residue, specifically dark chocolate—Tegan’s least favorite, while Sara just stared at her with familiar dark eyes and that sadistic smirk.

She leaned forward, slowly sipping from her glass. No matter how much eye contact Tegan made, nothing changed. Sara still looked at Tegan like a piece of meat she would have fun cutting and devouring, or maybe even sticking in the fridge. “Maybe hold off for now, wouldn’t want her getting sluggish.” Sara finally spoke up, leaning back in her seat.

Tegan knew better than to hope that Sara intervened for her sake. More like she was probably bored of the show Lindsey was providing. But the silver lining was the increased likelihood of Sara dictating this next part. But she hoped it wasn’t the part she knew was coming; the one she dreaded whenever Sara had company. She never invited someone over and told Tegan to come up just for them to observe and spice up Sara’s games with Tegan. The third party always got something out of it.

“Alright… Tegan, make sure the floor is clean.” Lindsey reached out with her foot and pushed Tegan’s face against the wooden surface, her sharp heel lightly digging into Tegan’s scalp, even through her hair.

Obediently, Tegan looked around for any remnants of chocolate and wiped away her own saliva using her hand, drying it against her calf. She looked up at the two women on the couch and sat on her bum, legs shielding her body from ravenous eyes. If it was just Sara, Tegan would have been willing to show everything and anything, but Sara chose Lindsey for a reason. After all, who wouldn’t want to punish, degrade, and humiliate the woman who dumped them because she was in love with her sister? And on top of that, who wouldn’t want to punish her for cheating on them with her sister their entire relationship? This was worse than any person that previously joined Sara’s game.

“Do you have to go to the bathroom, Tegan?” Sara asked her the way one would ask a little kid, but this was purposefully condescending

Tegan nodded, despite knowing she wouldn’t just get permission to go. But after hours of waiting, she really would need a bathroom soon.

“What if we make her have an accident and then clean it up?” Lindsey asked, turning to Sara. How had someone so sweet turned into a complete monster?

“I’m not opposed to that idea,” Sara replied. “But the real fun is seeing how much pain she can take tonight.”

“Physical or emotional?”

“Both. I feel like we’ll pack a bit more of a punch with the latter tonight.” Sara placed her wine glass on the coffee table. “Tegan, come here. Stop trying to cover yourself, or I’ll have to destroy those ugly rags you call clothes, regardless of if they’re on your body or not.” Sara wasn’t in the habit of providing fresh ones when she ripped Tegan’s. So Tegan would just have to zip up her hoodie and hope her jeans could make it from the elevator to the car, and then from the car into her own apartment.

Tegan moved to stand up, but Sara held out a hand, stopping her. So Tegan moved to her hands and knees and crawled over to Sara. Her face stung, there was a smacking noise, and Tegan realized Sara slapped her. She gasped, clutching her cheek.

“What are you gonna do with her, Sare?” Lindsey asked, leaning forward.

“Tegan, go get the rope,” Sara ordered.

Tegan hoped Sara wouldn’t just tie her up and leave her overnight. But she’d done that before, and only untied Tegan so she could yell at her for making a mess on her floor and made her clean it up before she was allowed to get dressed and leave. Though… Tegan couldn’t exactly deny the thrill she felt with the idea of being tied up. Sometimes Sara just made her go stand in the corner and watch, ignoring her until Sara wanted Tegan to go home. She savored the moments where Sara stood over her, securing the knots, and the pleasure her twin got. It turned Tegan on too, but her pleasure didn’t matter in Sara’s game.

She went into the hall closet, where Sara kept her linens and towels, and got up on her tip-toes to get the cardboard box off the top shelf. She stumbled back, making sure it didn’t fall, for if it did, Sara would be furious. Sara always made Tegan go get and put away this box, knowing she would struggle to get up there and take it down every single time. She’d dropped it multiple times, earning herself punishments from a gleeful Sara. There was plenty of room in Sara’s bedroom, her closet, or even the guest bedroom, but Sara wouldn’t want to give Tegan the idea that this game meant anything to her. So Tegan lugged the box out. When Sara wanted an item from the box, she meant she wanted the entire thing. The punishments Tegan received before she figured this out…

“You sure took your sweet time getting this,” Sara remarked when Tegan placed it next to her on the couch. “Kneel.”

Tegan did so quickly she worried about bruising. She received another slap across the face. God, she wanted to cry. But she did a good job of keeping it together so she wasn’t there yet.

“Respect me,” Sara ordered.

“What does that mean?” Lindsey asked, her voice obnoxious. “Ohh.” She dissolved into giggles when Tegan bent forward and kissed the toe on each of Sara’s steel toe Doc Martens. “Wow. This from the bitch who liked to be on top…”

“You just have to put her in her place and then you can do anything you want,” Sara replied, shrugging. “Tegan, go lay over there.” She pointed at the other couch, identical to the one she and Lindsey sat on.

Tegan made to lay with her head across from Sara.

“No, other way.” Sara corrected.

So she lay on her side, head on Lindsey‘s side. It was too much effort to look much anywhere else, especially since she figured Sara meant for her to watch her ex. Tegan managed to keep from thinking about Lindsey for a while, but the healed wound was reopened, especially since she knew what Sara planned on doing.

“Get on your stomach, face down.” Sara approached, and once Tegan complied, rough manila rope wrapped tightly around her ankles a few times, and then tied it with a secure knot. Sara didn’t bother using the kind of rope or knots that people in the bondage kink used… She didn’t care about safety in her game. “Put your wrists together behind your back.” Even though Tegan did so correctly, Sara still grabbed her wrists, lifting them up to an almost painful point, only to place them on the other length of rope, wrapping it around a few times and tied them together identically to her ankles. She approached Tegan’s face and knelt in front of her, a ball gag in her hand. The silicon ball went into her mouth; Tegan lifted her head so Sara could get the straps around the back of Tegan’s head, buckling it tight until it dug into her skin, forcing her mouth open to an uncomfortable point.

“I never knew I needed this view until now,” Lindsey remarked, getting up and joining Sara as she stood up to admire her handiwork.

“She won’t be able to make very much noise, so we can do whatever we want with her right now…” Sara licked her lips, staring down at Tegan in her helpless position. “Tegan _loves_ when I put clothespins on her…”

Tegan whimpered, ambivalent about this idea. She did like the clothespins; in fact she was the one who brought a package to Sara as a gift to try to impress her. Sara liked them too, more than Tegan did. In fact, she threw out the normal wooden ones Tegan bought and replaced them with plastic ones that had teeth. She even had Tegan string them together in groups of ten to make “zippers” so once they were all clamped on Tegan, Sara could pull the chord and rip them off in quick succession.

“I have a few ideas on where the pins can go…” Lindsey growled.

Dread let out a cry in Tegan’s gut, telling her to run. She’d never seen Lindsey sadistic, leaving her unsure if she could take both her and Sara combined. But Tegan couldn’t get out, even if she wanted to. She was already tied up and plus, figured she knew the extent of what Sara would do with her, and she was able to take all of that so far. Not to mention, her optimistic side hoped against hope that maybe, just maybe, after this time, Sara would realize how much she put Tegan through and apologize. They’d make gentle and sweet love and Tegan would finally sleep in Sara’s bed, in her arms.

“Break her the way she broke your heart.” Sara egged her on with a grin. She went into the box to pull out the plastic Ziploc bag of the clothespins with the zippers inside, offering it to Lindsey. “Let’s make her cry.”

With that, Tegan’s soft white hopes turned dark and grey, filled with a storm that wanted to leak out of her eyes, but Tegan’s tolerance served as a roadblock. Besides, Sara wouldn’t like it if Tegan started crying too early. Tegan didn’t have a very high pain tolerance, but she didn’t cry as easily anymore because Sara wanted to work for Tegan’s tears. It wasn’t satisfying, as she complained.

“On your back, Tegan,” Sara ordered, forcing Tegan to move around, her skin chaffing against the rope as she worked to turn over without falling off the couch, which would only make things worse for herself.

“This is probably the obvious choice, but…” Lindsey took a loose clothespin, using her other hand to hold Tegan’s breast still, clamping the pin onto Tegan’s stiff nipple and then added one to the other.

Tegan moaned through her gag. This wasn’t an unfamiliar sensation, but she had a low pain threshold and hadn’t exactly built a tolerance yet.

“That’s a good start, but the real fun is here.” Sara took a string of clothespins out, moving to Tegan’s breasts, making her try to shrink away. But she couldn’t escape Sara as she pinched the skin where Tegan’s areolas bordered the rest of her breast, clipping the clothespins in a circle, and when she ran out of room, peeled off toward the middle of her chest, forming a shape like a balloon with its string. She did the same thing on the other side, the clothespins into biting Tegan’s skin. Sara gently draped the string down the valley between Tegan’s breasts, the simple action ominous and foreboding.

The gag muffled Tegan’s whimpers, digging into her cheeks and the corners of her mouth. 

“I like that.” Lindsey agreed, grinning down at Tegan. “Are they good for all sensitive areas?”

“Oh, yeah. I love decorating her.” Sara’s eyes raked down Tegan’s body, probably searching for the best places to add more. “Here, let me show you the best place so we don’t mess up any others trying to put these ones on. Tegan, lift up your legs and spread your knees.”

Tegan closed her eyes as she moved into the degrading position, just trying to breathe through it. She didn’t want to sit up and go home, especially not since Sara gave her more attention now than she had in the past week. Besides, Tegan really did like it, as much as she might not want to admit it to anyone else.

“She’s wet!” Lindsey exclaimed, way too amused by this discovery.

“I told you, she loves it.” Sara slapped Tegan’s hip. “Here, hand me one of the clothespins.” She sat on the couch by Tegan’s bum, spreading her lips open to find the shaft of her clit.

Tegan squirmed, her body hungry for Sara’s touch as the clothespin clamped down on her slick and tender skin. She let out a small squeal when the feeling registered, her lower body trying to escape, despite the futility. Even if she managed to get the clothespin off, Sara would just put it back on again, furious that she had to.

“Stop that.” Sara stood up, standing by Tegan’s hips, pushing against the backs of her thighs, baring her even more while making it harder for Tegan to move; hitting two birds with one stone. “Linds, why don’t you go to town on her?”

“Ooh, yes.” Lindsey sat on the couch, taking Sara’s place. She held one side of Tegan’s nether lips between her thumb and forefinger, stretching it to its fullest extent and proceeded to place the clothespins, framing her most intimate area, moving to the other side. When she was finished, Sara let Tegan put her legs down. It did little to make her feel better about her position especially since the clothespins on her vulva were uncomfortable and Sara only added more onto Tegan’s body. Her stomach, a few on her neck, a zipper for each of her thighs…

“Doesn’t she look so much better?” Sara’s dark grin bored into Tegan’s heart as Lindsey agreed. “Now move onto your side, Tegan… carefully.”

Tegan didn’t need Sara to be more explicit about her warning. She faced out, giving a defeated sigh, seeing Sara standing way too close to Lindsey…

“So, what do you say?” Sara asked Tegan’s ex-girlfriend. “You want to put on a show for her?”

“Of course,” Lindsey answered. “I haven’t had sex since before that bitch broke up with me.”

“She hasn’t either.” Sara laughed sadistically, turning to Tegan. “She played herself…. thinking breaking up with you would impress me.” They kissed, and it stabbed into Tegan’s heart.

Her lips wanted to tremble around the gag, but they couldn’t. There was a lump in her throat, only growing as she watched the woman she loved kiss the woman she used to love.

Sara and Lindsey moved to the other couch, Sara kissing Lindsey’s neck, gently helping her out of her clothes, and Lindsey tugging at Sara’s shirt, eventually unbuttoning it. Sara only shed her blazer, leaving her shirt unbuttoned, bra on. Lindsey stripped down to her bra, nothing else. Sara selected a strap-on from the box, asking Lindsey if she would like it inside her, to which Lindsey agreed. They put a condom on it before putting it on Sara’s naked lower half. They kissed and caressed each other in ways Tegan wished to do with Sara. But that was by design.

Whenever Sara brought a woman up to play with Tegan, she’d ask her guest if she wanted to have sex, and they would do so while Tegan watched, but she was rarely allowed to just sit on the couch and watch. Sara usually restrained or “decorated” her. Sara was always kind and gentle with her guests, just to rub salt into Tegan’s wounds. At first, Tegan would struggle against her restraints, crying and whimpering, but Sara harshly reminded her how little that would do, so Tegan just stay put and tried not to make any noise. Upon learning that lesson, Sara more frequently allowed Tegan to stay after she and the guest finished or after the guest left. All Tegan wanted was Sara’s undivided attention… Perhaps after Sara and Lindsey finished having sex, it would just be the twins left together…

She was ripped out of her thoughts and hopes by Lindsey screaming Sara’s name, reminding Tegan that it used to be her fucking Lindsey with a strap-on; that she wished it was her currently in Lindsey’s place… her eyes stung with tears, but she clenched them shut. Sara would be upset if she saw Tegan crying already, and she might get sent home.

“Open your eyes!” Sara snarled at Tegan. “Watch me make love to your ex-girlfriend.”

Tegan’s drool trickled out of the corners of her mouth, down her jaw as she tried to keep herself together. Every second Sara and Lindsey touched each other with kindness that Tegan wasn’t allowed pricked like a pin into her soul. The clothespins didn’t hurt as much as the scene in front of her did. What would it take for Sara to kiss her? What could she do to earn her twin’s love?

Lindsey’s moans burned into her heart, just as Sara intended. But Lindsey was probably purposefully making more noise with Sara than she ever had with Tegan… This was honestly the ideal person Sara could have chosen to gang up on Tegan with. And her choice of the words “make love” as opposed to simply “fuck” were deliberate as well. Sara was a certified gold medalist hurting Tegan… and yet she liked it. Her pain fueled her arousal, which felt so good, even when she was left so her flame burnt out. So good that Tegan kept returning for more.

Tegan braced herself for the orgasms she saw the signs for. She didn’t know it was possible to further fall down a peg or three, but Sara’s moans and groans as she came from fucking Lindsey… Sara turned her head to stare into Tegan’s eyes just before she threw her head back, making the face that sent a rush of heat between Tegan’s legs. Seeing Sara cum was the hottest thing Tegan had ever seen. But she could count the number of times she’d given Sara the orgasm behind that face on her fingers. A similar number was the amount of times Sara fucked Tegan and gave her an orgasm. Those times were rare treasures but weren’t what kept Tegan coming back.

Sara composed herself and kissed Lindsey’s neck, working harder as Lindsey’s noises increased in pitch until she went over the edge. Sara held her as they both caught their breath, eyes locked on Tegan’s, easing Lindsey down. Such kindness…

“She’s not crying yet,” Sara remarked. “Lindsey, look… She kept it together so far.”

“What do you want to do with her to get her to cry?” Lindsey asked.

Sara sat up, removing her body from Lindsey’s. She stared at Tegan as she buttoned up her dress shirt, likely mulling over her options in making Tegan cry. Sara took the dildo and harness off before pulling on her pants. She even put on her boots. Lindsey dressed as well, making Tegan self-conscious about her own nudity, but that was probably their goal. Sara picked up the dildo covered in Lindsey’s fluids, giving Tegan a good idea of where that was going. But just as soon as she picked it up, she unfolded a napkin on the coffee table and carefully placed the phallus onto it, probably as not to dirty her furniture. Sara continued forward and leaned over Tegan, unbuckling the ball gag, tossing it to the side.

Tegan didn’t dare speak without permission, just closed her mouth.

“Look who slobbered all over herself. Disgusting.” Sara’s cold voice held delight. Of course, Sara loved seeing Tegan like this. “Move onto your back.” As soon as Tegan lay parallel to the ceiling, Sara’s hand darted out and yanked a clothespin off Tegan’s neck, tearing it off.

Tegan cried out, not from the removal process, but the burning in the area where it had been. The next one, Sara slowly pulled at it until the teeth lost grip on her skin. She’d be left with marks on her neck for sure. But Sara didn’t care about that. In fact, she didn’t even care if she broke the skin. Tegan could just wear a turtleneck or cover it up with makeup or a scarf; a tried and true method.

Lindsey joined Sara, also fully dressed, plucking off the clothespins on Tegan’s stomach. She seemed to be trying to make each one worse than the last, but she wasn’t experienced at all, and it showed.

Sara, however, took one of the ends of the clothespin on the farthest nipple from her (taking care to disturb the other clothespin, adding to the pain on Tegan’s chest) and twisted it like she was opening the cap on a bottle. Tegan cried out, the teeth scraping against the sensitive skin. But when the clothespin finally came off, it provided little relief, the pain almost echoing in the stiff, abused bud. Tegan tensed again when Sara took an end of the other clothespin on her nipple, and simply pulled upward, eliciting a long pained moan until the teeth of the plastic clothespin finally let go.

“Still not crying?” Sara looked into Tegan’s eyes to see that her eyes had not yet formed actual tears. “I remember when you used to cry over just that.” She turned to her company. “Hey Linds, watch this.” Sara picked up one of the strings on Tegan’s chest, immediately making her flinch, bracing herself in dread.

Tegan turned her head away, squeezing her eyes shut. Her entire body stiffened, praying it wouldn’t hurt so bad. She unintentionally let out a whine, preparing herself. She didn’t relax when the two women standing over her burst out laughing at her reaction. Sara was about to pull the string, and it was going to hurt. Tegan liked the pain, but she was scared of it. If it weren’t for Sara’s game, she wouldn’t have figured out she liked it. Her fear only fueled her enjoyment of it. Tegan knew it was terrible… but she liked it. She liked it and—

“OW!” The exclamation came from Tegan’s lips without her consent as Sara pulled the zipper. This time, she did it quickly to give Tegan the burn of the clothespins scraping against her skin all at once, igniting the area around her areola. The string of clothespins fell onto her stomach and suddenly she cried out again as her hair was yanked, Sara’s eyes glaring down into her own, her head held away from the couch, the weight of her head straining on her scalp.

“Don’t be such a fucking baby.” Sara spat in her face. Lindsey could be heard snickering just out of Tegan’s sight range. “Show my guest how much you can take. Do I make myself clear?”

“Yes, Sara,” Tegan answered. Sara loved hearing her own name from Tegan and the people she fucked. But she didn’t like hearing Tegan talk without permission, she just liked hearing Tegan’s distressed noises.

She unceremoniously dropped Tegan’s hair, her head hitting the couch cushion again. Instead, Sara picked up the remaining string and pulled on it, slower this time. This drew out the pain, though the intensity decreased significantly. Tegan’s eyes watered and her vision briefly blurred but, after blinking, couldn’t form any actual tears. And then she felt a similar burn on her thighs… That had to be Lindsey. Tegan just vocally let it all out, earning Sara’s hand roughly massaging her chest, her sore nipple protesting at the contact. Her mewls grew higher pitched, but she still couldn’t cry; not even when Lindsey pulled the other zipper, glaring daggers into Tegan’s heart. The lack of mercy or fondness in her ex-lover’s eyes made Tegan want to cry even more, but she couldn’t. She was on the verge of tears, but she needed something more.

“She’s so well-trained,” Lindsey commented, staring at Tegan in delighted fascination. “She’s not crying yet… This is the same person who cried when she’d bump her hip or elbow. ”

“When it’s just the two of us, I sometimes pick one or two things to do to her over and over again until she can’t take anymore… That’s if I’m feeling nice. Other times I play with her desperation for me to pay any attention to her.” Sara grinned down at Tegan. “Isn’t that right Tegan?”

She nodded because it was true.

“You like it, don’t you?” Sara grabbed Tegan’s face, her fingers clawing into Tegan’s cheek, her thumb into the other. She lost interest in Tegan’s breast, allowing her to recover from the clothespins in that area, at least. 

“Yes!” Tegan managed. Again… This was true. Apparently satisfied, Sara let go of her face.

“You heard her, Sara. Let’s give her what she wants.” Lindsey opened the clothespin on the shaft of Tegan’s clit, making her squirm. Thankfully, she didn’t try to rip it off. Lindsey wasn’t that cruel… not yet, at least. Lindsey removed the rest of the clothespins on Tegan’s vulva, letting the blood in her veins circulate again, feeling rather like magma. At least her breasts were left alone so far; Sara watching Lindsey, licking her lips.

“What should we give her next?” Sara asked, gesturing toward the box of toys with her chin.

“We should probably wash her dirty mouth after it touched the floor…” Lindsey grinned, removing the last of the clothespins. “We wouldn’t want her contaminating anything else.”

“And after breaking up with you… We really should clean it with soap.” Sara turned back to Tegan. “Sit up.” As soon as Tegan did, Sara pushed her head down to meet her knees so she could untie Tegan’s hands. “Linds, get her ankles. We don’t need her making a scene over her bonds.”

“Geez Sara, were you a boy scout in another life?” Lindsey struggled to undo the knot while Sara worked away at the other one, gaining more success at loosening it since she had a lot more practice.

“Nah, but after Tegan started coming over and plain old handcuffs weren’t going to scratch my itch, I went on YouTube learned how to tie quick and secure knots… Tegan sure had fun when I was practicing, didn’t you?” Sara reached around Tegan and grabbed her breast, briefly kneading it, making sure to touch the raw spots.

“Yes, Sara,” Tegan answered. She cherished those times in her memories, even though the wicked rope burn had been awful. Sara couldn’t be bothered to learn the techniques or use the rope recommended for rope bondage in kink circles since she cared very little for Tegan’s safety when playing her games. Tegan used to point out that this or that wasn’t safe but Sara would just slap her for speaking out of turn and reply: “That sounds like a you problem.” Tegan learned to just take it. And to a certain extent, it aroused her that Sara didn’t care. Sure, it pained her heart and soul, but in the end, it just made Tegan wet under Sara’s glare. Sara knew this, and by extension, how much she could get away with, which was a lot… Tegan was almost horrified at what she could force herself to take just because she wanted Sara to notice her… See her… Acknowledge her beyond viewing Tegan as a toy to keep bending and bending, since she wouldn’t break. Well, not yet at least.

Tegan could just push either woman away, say she didn’t want to do this anymore, tell them no, tell them to stop, and it would all stop. She could just leave. But she didn’t want this to end. They could do whatever they wanted to her and she just wanted to take it.

The rope finally came off Tegan’s wrists and she sat up just enough to check how bad the rope burn was. Her wrists were pink. Tegan gently caressed her marred skin as she watched Lindsey finally loosen the knot and untie Tegan’s ankles. She didn’t get a chance to check them because Sara grabbed her by the hair, pulling her off the couch.

“Come on, dirty slut, we need to clean you up.” Sara’s hand was down by her side, keeping Tegan from standing upright, forcing her to stumble along as she followed Sara into the kitchen. Sara finally released her when they were in front of the sink. “Stand up straight.”

Tegan did so, her back aching as she finally did, daring to look Sara in the face and admire her perfect features. At this moment, they radiated coldness and cruelty, but while Tegan was attracted to Sara when she was like this, her heart began to flutter like a butterfly when at family functions, listening to Sara dominate a conversation. Seeing the fiery passion in her eyes as she proved a male relative wrong in a political discussion… Sara was so smart, confident, and beautiful… not to mention fun (with others who weren’t Tegan). She lit the candle of Tegan’s heart. But she also poured gasoline on the wildfire between Tegan’s legs. Both were like drugs in Tegan’s system and she’d be damned before she broke her addiction. She didn’t care what Sara did to her, as long as it was her doing it. Sure, Sara bringing others into it gave Tegan pause, especially since it was Lindsey, but regardless if she lied to herself about wanting it, her pants would be on fire, but in different ways.

So when Sara told her to bend over backward over the sink, Tegan obeyed. Her balance was off, and the edge of the sink was uncomfortable against her neck.

There was a sigh. “I suppose if you want something done right, you’ve got to do it yourself,” Sara grumbled. But then her voice changed. “Hey Lindsey, why don’t you operate the sink? Tegan’s not flexible on her own, but I know how to get her into the position I want her in.”

Movement surrounded Tegan, but she just stared straight up at the lights above the sink. Sara took hold of her shoulders, grip tight and unforgiving, the rough fabric on her determined frame shoving Tegan against the cabinet, forcing her back to bend more, her head being pushed into the sink. Tegan forced herself to relax. She’d been doing yoga for a reason.

“That doesn’t hurt her?!” Lindsey questioned.

“Doesn’t matter,” Sara replied. “Hurry up and start washing her mouth, Tegan gets lightheaded if all the blood rushes to her head and she stands up straight again, and it’s fucking annoying.”

In response, Lindsey turned on the faucet, hitting Tegan’s face. She held her breath, trying not to sputter, not even when Lindsey pulled her mouth open, some water going inside, but apparently resolving to use the spray hose to fill her mouth with water. Her senses were overwhelmed the water rushing onto her. She couldn’t see or hear anything else. By this point, Tegan couldn’t hold her breath any longer, and turned her head to the side and spat it out.

The faucet was moved so it wasn’t pouring on her face anymore, and then a hand struck her across the face. “Did we tell you to spit?!” Sara demanded.

“N-no!”  Tegan gasped for air. “I’m sorry, I couldn’t hear!”

Sara slapped her again. “Lindsey, let’s get some soap in there.”

Tegan left her mouth open, even when the bitter lemon scented dish soap touched her tongue and she wanted to gag. But she just breathed through her mouth, letting Lindsey spray the inside of her mouth, suds forming.

“Spit to the side,” Lindsey instructed.

Tegan did so, soap still coating the inside of her mouth, forcing herself to remain calm. Sara’s grip on her was relentless, but Tegan resisted the urge to struggle. She could even think of Sara’s persistent pressure against her own body as comforting. A deep breath through Tegan’s nose, even with Lindsey filling her mouth again, and Tegan could relax a little more. She even worked with her ex-girlfriend, swishing water through her teeth before spitting. In return, Lindsey didn’t run the faucet on Tegan’s face. But a familiar sadistic pleasure etched itself into Tegan’s ex-lover’s features. She tried to force herself to be concerned, but Tegan honestly didn’t care. If she had other consequences later, she would deal with it then. Might as well enjoy the attention now.

“Ok, dirty slut, your mouth is the cleanest part of you, now. Which means we can use it to clean other stuff off.” Sara informed her. She let up on Tegan, but the second she stood up straight, Sara turned her around, bending her over the sink again, Tegan’s back aching pleasantly. This time, Sara gathered Tegan’s hair together, pulling a little too much (but Tegan liked it) and wrung the water out. “Can’t having you track water all around my nice apartment,” Sara warned. “If I see a single drop on the floor or a wet spot on the furniture, I will beat your ass red.”

“Yes, Sara.” Tegan answered, more than ok with that idea, her pelvis growing warm.

“Can I help?” Lindsey asked, grinning.

Tegan didn’t like that idea.

“Hmm… we could do different tools at the same time, maybe you could hit her ass while I spank her pussy… I bet Tegan would love that…” There was the sound of the two of them kissing, and Tegan wished they would just do their next thing with her.

“I don’t think something as low as her should get to walk on two legs.” Lindsey decided, hand grabbing Tegan’s ass cheek, nails digging into her skin.

“You heard her, Tegan.” Sara pulled her back from the skink by her hair. “Hands and knees.” Sara finally let go when Tegan did so, looking up to her. “I’ll be right back. Lindsey, have fun.” Sara grinned, presumably heading back to the couches to get something.

“Spread your legs, I want to see how wet you are.” Lindsey instructed.

Tegan reluctantly moved her knees more than shoulder width, her gut unhappy with the humiliation position she was in, but her libido loving it.

“Wow… You really do love this.” Lindsey scoffed. “You’re a fucking pain slut. I got dumped by a pain slut.” She let out a short laugh of disbelief as she slowly moved around to Tegan’s front end.

Tegan was slapped again. And then again, but she bit back any noises that wanted to come out.

“Maybe I can just give you exactly what you wanted.” Her voice was pained, making Tegan flinch, bracing herself for whatever Lindsey was about to inflict upon her.

“You want a strap-on for that?” Sara asked, placing the box of toys onto the counter.

“Yeah.” Lindsey’s voice was short. She strode over to the box, pulling out a harness and putting it on over her clothes with quick and jerky movements, her jaw set.

“Respect me,” Sara commanded.

Tegan scrambled to crawl over to her, and delicately kissed each of the toes of her boots.

“Respect me!” Lindsey snapped.

Tegan didn’t exactly take her time coming over to her, but she also didn’t move nearly as quickly as she did for Sara. She didn’t even pucker her lips to kiss Lindsey’s heeled boots either, simply pressing her lips against the toes.

“Tegan, that is no way to treat a guest.” Sara’s voice was deathly calm, but the warning was clear. “If you can’t give her the same respect you give me, you may leave after I confiscate your undergarments.” That usually meant burning them right in front of Tegan’s eyes and then being told to get out of Sara’s apartment.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” Tegan muttered, placing a proper kiss on each of Lindsey’s boots.

“Here, LB, give her a little something to respect.” Sara handed Lindsey the phallus covered in her own fluids; the one Sara had used on her.

Was Tegan going to get fucked by Lindsey? If this took away from receiving it from Sara another time, Tegan was going to be really upset.

“Suck me off, whore.” Lindsey practically spat. “Take all of it.”

Tegan eyed the cock shining in the light but rose up to take the tip into her mouth, slowly taking more as she bobbed her head up and down the length. Lindsey grabbed her hair, using it as a handle, but didn’t take full control of Tegan’s movements yet.

“Move your knees further apart, Tegan,” Sara instructed.

She did and was delighted to hear the snap of a plastic bottle opening. Cold lube was applied to her anus, a finger none too gently probing her hole. It was obvious a latex glove covered Sara’s digit as she steadily pushed her way into Tegan’s ass. Tegan forced herself to relax. Sara was only going to give Tegan the minimal amount of prep… Just so whatever was lined up would actually go in. And in following that, as soon as Sara got her entire finger inside Tegan, she pulled out and went back in with two.

Tegan moaned into the dick in her mouth.

Lindsey pulled at her hair, urging Tegan to take more since she hadn’t started deepthroating it yet. But apparently her ex was impatient, so she pulled on Tegan’s hair until she took the entire thing, down to the base. It was hard to stay calm when Lindsey did this, especially since in their relationship, Tegan never took a strap-on into her mouth for Lindsey. She doubted she even let Lindsey fuck her pussy with one.

At the same time, Sara pushed a lube covered butt plug into Tegan’s ass. If the sizes could be classified as small, medium, and large, one might almost guess Sara didn’t know there were any smaller than the medium size. No matter how big it was, Sara disliked letting Tegan get used to the size, continuously moving it in and out. Tegan suspected that was to prevent it from feeling good. Or as good as it could be. Tegan liked being stretched open in any of her holes under Sara’s hand.

Honestly, neither woman really wanted to make Tegan good, just sticking things inside her for their own amusement.

Lindsey finally yanked Tegan’s hair back, pulling the dildo out of her mouth, staring down at her without releasing Tegan’s hair.

“Something wrong, Linds?” Sara asked, continuing to move the butt plugs in Tegan’s ass. “Or do you want to try something new?”

“I want to make her cry. Fucking bawl…” Lindsey looked like she wanted to cry herself. She finally let go of Tegan’s hair. “I want to give her everything she left me for…”

Sara pulled the butt plug out of Tegan’s ass and stood up. A few beats went by where Tegan stared at the floor, unsure what to do. “Turn around, Tegan.”

Tegan faced Sara, frowning as she wondered what her twin had in mind to make her cry, the way Lindsey seemed to want. Tegan had learned to like so many things, and Sara knew this…

Her wrists were tied with the rope again but in front of her this time. Once Sara seemed satisfied that the bonds were tight enough, she turned to the box again and produced a pair of nipple clamps, placing them on each nipple. Tegan whimpered as each one went on, but when Sara didn’t just drop the chain, she let out a wail of dismay. She echoed that same sound as Sara pulled the chain out taught, and then up until her hand was level with Tegan’s eyes, the pull on her already-abused nipples excruciating.

“I’m going to get this chain over your head, one way or another, and I don’t care if you like it,” Sara said calmly. “If you don’t want to work with me, that’s fine… In fact, I get to watch you suffer the consequences.”

Tegan bowed her head as far as she could manage. Sara placed the chain at the middle of her neck, taking Tegan’s chin into her fingers, lifting her head up. This was not an act of tenderness, regardless of what Tegan wished. It was a damning act, pulling harder on her nipples than before, but this time it was Tegan’s own body torturing itself. To add insult to injury, Tegan could honestly just release her poor nipples from all the pain. She realized this, glancing down at the rope burns around her wrists and looked up to Sara, getting her a smirk.

“She needs more,” Lindsey said through gritted teeth.

“I mean you can stick that up her bum.” Sara shrugged, gesturing at Lindsey’s strap-on. “I was just playing with her while you were doing your thing, but you could use her if you wanted.”

“I might take you up on that,” Lindsey replied after a beat. “What do you want to do?”

“Watch you.” Sara grinned. “Tegan wants me to fuck her, whether it’s her pussy, her ass, her mouth, her tits, she doesn’t care. It’s fun to watch my guests use her while I’m right here.” She paused. “Plus, someone has to make sure she’s not having any fun. I know what she looks like getting it up the ass, so I can make sure she won’t get off.” Sara patted Tegan’s cheek, though it was almost hard enough to be another slap.

“Bend over. Now.” Lindsey ordered.

Sara retreated to lean against the counter, arms crossed over her chest, eyes resting on Tegan. Her silent instructions were clear: put on a good show.

So Tegan braced her forearms against the floor, spreading her knees… baring herself for Lindsey. She’d never done this before; not for Lindsey. She just hoped it would be gentle. She couldn’t hope for kindness, but she could for mercy. She took a deep breath, trying to relax her body. 

Lindsey apparently decided to forgo lube (at least Tegan’s mouth got the toy nice and wet first) and just went for it, persistently pushing into Tegan. Her fingers dug into Tegan’s hips, almost like claws. The head of the phallus went in, stretching Tegan open.

She looked up, meeting Sara’s dark eyes, but her twin didn’t even acknowledge her. Tegan felt like she should look away; like she was being disrespectful. She bowed her head. It gave more slack to the chain of the nipple clamps anyway. She might as well just try to enjoy what she got.

“Unclench, dammit,” Lindsey’s hand left Tegan’s hip to pull at her hair, ironically making it harder for Tegan to relax and do the thing Lindsey wanted and Tegan needed.

“Add more lube, her spit probably isn’t letting you move enough to have any fun,” Sara advised. “The great thing about this is if she doesn’t fully cooperate, it’s worse for her.”

Lindsey pulled out, leaving Tegan feeling empty. She didn’t dare move, so she just let Lindsey put lube on her dick and took deep breaths as her ex-girlfriend pushed back into her as quickly as possible, forcing a pained noise out of Tegan. Lindsey gripped her hips tightly again as she sank all the way into Tegan’s ass, a familiar pleased moan filling Tegan’s ears. But apparently getting all the way into Tegan’s ass didn’t satisfy Lindsey for long; no. She started moving as much as possible, using more force than necessary to thrust in and out of Tegan’s hole.

 Sara was into it, just barely nodding her head, almost like she was in a trance, licking her lips. She didn’t meet Tegan’s eyes, instead focusing on her body. Apparently, she got tired of looking at the front half of Tegan, because she strolled around behind her, probably so she could see exactly what Lindsey was doing.

Feeling Sara’s eyes on her, focused on one place hungry for something that wasn’t food, Tegan couldn’t deny the arousal that built up inside her. Her clit begged to be touched, but she wasn’t going to get any attention there. Well… Considering the clamps on her nipples, Tegan could safely say she wouldn’t be getting any of the good kind of attention on her clit. But regardless of what Sara wanted to give Tegan, she would happily take it. Tegan couldn’t help herself. So she just let everything play out; giving into the intense feelings.

There was a small jingle of metal and the movement of materials together, a soft slap, and then something harshly smacked Tegan’s back, making her cry out. She had to guess that Sara took off her belt; the impact was familiar.

“It’ll be worse for you if you cum,” Sara warned. “Don’t even think about it.”

Tegan almost assured Sara that she wasn’t going to, but quickly shut her mouth, biting into her lip almost hard enough to draw blood. Her back was struck again, the telltale swish making her heart drop, and then a third time. The first hit made her tense up, the second one, even more so, and now Lindsey was having trouble moving in her ass. It was hard to relax her rigid body because Sara was still behind her holding the belt. But if she didn’t let Lindsey fuck her as thoroughly as she wanted, Tegan was in big trouble.

As predicted, Lindsey pulled out and grabbed her hair, yanking Tegan’s head back. “How many times am I going to have to tell you to unclench?!”

“Allow me,” Sara spoke up.

There was movement behind Tegan; she could feel Lindsey going to her side, and Tegan was forced to stand up on her knees. The hard tile of the kitchen was not kind to her, but it and her current situation fed her arousal. She hoped Sara would touch her this time…

Sara hit Tegan’s ass with the belt… Not what Tegan meant. But dammit if she didn’t like it. This time Sara didn’t hold back, striking harder than she ever dared on any other part of Tegan’s body.

The grip on her hair kept Tegan from instinctively leaning away from the merciless strikes that rained down on her rear end. It also pulled her head back, tugging harder on the nipple clamps. She squeezed her eyes shut. The pain from her scalp, nipples, and ass… they were different kinds, but they all screamed for Tegan’s attention. Over all of that, the cool air touching the wetness between her legs hissed in her ear. Tears gathered in Tegan’s eyes, and a sob built up, exploding out of her like a volcano erupting. And Tegan cried. She opened her eyes, blinking until the tears fell from her lashes.

“Oh, there we go.” Sara purred, pleased. There was a clank as the belt hit the floor and Sara walked around to Tegan’s front.

Lindsey released Tegan’s hair, joining Sara’s side. “She’s crying?”

Sara nodded, staring down at Tegan. “Finally. I can’t decide if it’s more fun if she cries easily or if it takes a lot. It certainly took a bit this time.”

“May I…?” Lindsey gestured toward Tegan, who couldn’t stop crying now that the floodgate was open. The fact that Sara had stopped spanking her and Lindsey was no longer pulling her hair didn’t matter; Sara didn’t love her, she just loved fucking and fucking with Tegan. And so there she was, choosing to be tortured by Sara in whatever ways her twin wanted… And Tegan liked it. She even liked crying because she knew Sara liked it. In fact, Sara made no secret about being turned on by Tegan’s tears.

“Go ahead.” Sara grinned, her expression dark and sort of scary.

Lindsey grabbed the sides of Tegan’s head and licked up her cheeks, following the trail of tears up to Tegan’s under eye, and then starting again. It probably didn’t taste good at all, but with all the humming and moaning Lindsey was doing, one would have thought it was some fancy dessert.

“Feels good, doesn’t it?” Sara had done the exact thing before.

Sure, Tegan liked everything that was happening to her… she loved it, like the masochist she was, but she wished it was Sara licking her face, that Sara had been the one fucking her ass. And sure, Sara’s reasons for wanting to torture Tegan weren’t good, but they were a hell of a lot safer than Lindsey’s apparent thirst for revenge for her broken heart. But Sara chose her partner for that reason.

Lindsey pulled away, releasing Tegan and standing up. “She likes it though.”

“She likes anything as long as I’m involved. She just takes it.” Sara shrugged. “I have yet to push her so far she asks for it to stop or for her to just get up and leave before I tell her to.”

A shadow passed over Lindsey’s face, and a diabolical grin etched itself onto her lips. “I have an idea… I don’t know if you’ve done this before…”

Sara put an arm over Lindsey’s shoulders, eyes staring down at Tegan as Lindsey whispered the idea into her ear.

Tegan didn’t know whether she would worry… after all, there was a lot Sara had done with her, so she doubted Lindsey would be able to come up with anything very shocking. In the entire duration of their relationship, they strictly adhered to a vanilla sex life. Tegan couldn’t help but wonder if things would have gone differently if she and Lindsey had explored kink together. But then again, Sara was Sara, and Lindsey could never serve as an adequate substitute. After all, Tegan didn’t even start out as a masochist… she just loved Sara so blindly that she let her do what she wanted and Tegan found she liked it. But regardless, Tegan should have introduced the idea of BDSM to Lindsey since she seemed to take to it so well and Tegan wouldn’t have been on this side of it.

“I haven’t done that to her yet, but we certainly can now.” Sara grinned, turning to Lindsey and gently kissed her on the lips.

Tegan’s heart let out a soft sad whimper of protest, a fresh wave of tears falling from her eyes. What could Lindsey have possibly suggested?!

“One condition, though,” Sara continued.

“I’ll do almost anything for this,” Lindsey answered through gritted teeth, glaring down at Tegan, making her want to shrink away in fear. All of the pain and anger that shot daggers at Tegan only prolonged her crying.

“I like to keep a clean apartment, so you’ll need to clean her off afterward,” Sara explained.

“I’m not giving her a bath,” Lindsey interjected.

The dread built up in Tegan’s gut. She wanted to know what Lindsey wanted so bad, wishing it was over with, but at the same time, Tegan feared the answer, hoping to delay whatever probably-depraved thing that would be inflicted upon her.

“You don’t need to bathe her, just rinse her off.” Sara shrugged. “Besides, she’ll definitely cooperate after that, therefore doing most of the work.” She placed a kiss on Lindsey’s neck, eyes locked with Tegan’s.

“Good point. I just…” Linsey swallowed, voice getting stuck in her throat.

“I know, and you finally get to put her in her place,” Sara turned to Lindsey, kissing her on the lips again. She pulled away and squatted down and released the clamps on Tegan’s nipples, making her cry out as the blood started flowing again, tears falling faster from the pain.

Tegan looked into Sara’s eyes, silently pleading her for kindness, but only seeing sadistic pleasure.

Standing up straight again, Sara dropped the nipple clamps on the counter. “Hey Linds, can you get the bathroom ready?”

“Of course.” Lindsey turned and strode down the hallway.

Tegan’s eyes followed her and then looked back at Sara, noticing her twin watched her with an eyebrow raised, like she expected Tegan to get up and leave. But Tegan had never left before and didn’t plan on doing so now. As long as Sara allowed her to be there, she would be.

There was an amused exhale; like Sara couldn’t believe Tegan was still there; like Tegan was being a fool. Well, even more so than usual. “So… Should I make you crawl on all fours or will I let you walk like a normal person…” Sara smirked, knowing, either way, Tegan would do it.

She didn’t give input, as Sara didn’t legitimately want it.

With a slap to Tegan’s face, Sara instructed her to stand up, pinching one of her nipples and pulling Tegan in the direction she wanted. Sara smirked the entire time, squeezing harder on the painful bud, making Tegan worry that she might have a bruise later on. It was more likely she’d have multiple; her nipples, her ass, her back… But she didn’t want to think about that any longer and just followed Sara into the bathroom, the one next to the guest bedroom. (Not that Tegan had ever slept in there.)

Inside the bathroom, Lindsey stood scowling, arms crossed over her chest. The bath and shower mats hung over the top of the sliding glass door, and the tub remained dry. Confused, Tegan looked at Sara with furrowed eyebrows. Neither of the women in charge spoke, but Tegan got the feeling she was supposed to get in the tub. However, seeing the toilet reminded Tegan that she needed to go to the bathroom, but her mind had been on other things, and the need only just hit her again. She hesitated, but finally decided to speak.

“Um… I have to go to… um… go.” Tegan was embarrassed about having to admit that in front of people while she was naked and they were not, and the toilet was right there.

“And?” Sara raised an eyebrow. “Stand in the tub, Tegan.”

Tegan shut her mouth and stepped into the bathtub, turning around to look at her sister and ex-lover. She wanted to cry again, but she didn’t want to before she even found out what they wanted to do with her.

“You can go to the bathroom now,” Sara informed her as Lindsey began to take off her shoes and socks, neither of them taking their eyes off Tegan.

“Wh-what?” Tegan furrowed her eyebrows.

“You had to go, now do it,” Sara spoke slowly and clearly. She was going to be furious if Tegan made her repeat herself. “Piss on yourself. Right now.”

Tegan wanted to close her eyes but didn’t think that would go well. She took deep breaths and pushed past her inhibitions and the natural barriers that told her not to, both consciously and subconsciously. The hot liquid ran down her legs, audibly hitting the tub. Tegan’s face grew hot as her humiliation filled her. She wanted to cry, but she couldn’t quite manage to. Besides, it was bad enough that she had just peed on herself with an audience. And she liked it, to boot.

“What do you think, Linds? Is this satisfying your craving?” Sara asked.

Lindsey had stripped down to just her bra. Tegan realized she’d lost weight since they last had sex and her shame only inflated. She wanted to apologize, but clearly, Lindsey was past that point.

“It feels so good, seeing her like that…” Lindsey said through gritted teeth. “Lay down, Tegan.”

“But—”

“You heard her, lay down. It’s your own damn piss.” Sara commanded.

Tegan glanced at her and sighed, laying on the floor of the tub (her head on the far side from the faucet), feeling disgusting. And then it occurred to her: Lindsey had just stripped and made Tegan lay down... Nothing good could come of this. Her fears were confirmed as Lindsey stepped into the tub, feet on either side of Tegan’s biceps. Oh god… Lindsey really wanted to do this… Tegan had never entertained the idea of this before. Part of her was curious, wanting it to a certain degree, but the other part wasn’t ready. She needed to be comfortable, time to think about this, and Sara had to be the one doing it. But then again, she’d felt similarly about her first time having anal sex performed on her (also thanks to Sara)…

“Sara, please,” Tegan blurted out, a last-ditch effort to halt things. “I don’t mind if you do it, but…” Her heart was pounding, feeling small underneath Lindsey’s hateful stare.

“Quiet!” Sara snapped. “I didn’t say you could speak. This isn’t anything you can’t stop, so if you’re going to be here, you’re going to obey both of us.”

Tegan shut up, humiliation scalding her insides but fueling her arousal. She squeezed her eyes and mouth shut, holding her breath.

The hot liquid fell on her, and Tegan wondered if she would be sick. It felt like it lasted forever, and Tegan wanted to cry. Sara probably wouldn’t want to touch her now that she was gross all over.

When Lindsey finished and stepped out of the bathtub, Tegan sat up, opening her eyes, staring at her knees.

“How do you feel?” Sara asked.

She glanced up.

“It’s satisfying,” Lindsey answered, cleaning herself off with toilet paper and chucking it into the toilet as she got dressed again. “I mean, obviously I can’t rip out her heart, toss it in a meatgrinder, and then scoop up the remains and put it back in her chest like she did to me, but revenge does make it easier.”

Tegan’s heart sank upon realizing that Sara hadn’t been asking her. But then again, neither of them could just ignore Tegan, especially in her current state. Even if her being covered in urine wouldn’t catch Sara’s attention, the state of the bathtub would. The only warmth came from the remnants of the bodily fluid that trickled down the bathtub and clung to Tegan’s skin… it was cool in the bathroom, making it that much more unpleasant.

“What about you, Tegan, did you like getting pissed on?” Sara’s condescending tone pushed Tegan into tears again. “Wow, Linds… you made her cry again. Sounds like she loved it.” Sara strode over to the shower-tub and turned on the water, setting it to the coldest it would go.

Tegan yelped as the cold water sprayed against her, unsure if this was an improvement or not.

“Linds, can you clean her up? There’s soap under the sink, just dump it on her, let Tegan do all the work. I need to go get my old towels.” Sara let out an exasperated sigh, striding out of the room, leaving them alone together.

Lindsey opened the cabinet under the sink and pulled out a bottle of body wash… the cheap kind Sara probably kept for guests. She looked at Tegan, a smug expression on her face.

Tegan avoided eye contact, turning her back to the woman who used to spoon her in bed and kiss her neck in the morning instead of letting the alarm clock wake her up. She didn’t flinch when the sliding glass door opened and soap was poured onto her head, and then onto her shoulders before Lindsey shut the glass door again. Tegan stepped out of the spray and frantically scrubbed herself, hoping this would leave her feeling clean. She didn’t dare raise her hopes, but this would do something… She knew urine was supposed to be sterile, but that didn’t remove her feelings about it. She wanted to bathe in bleach and scrub at her skin with a bath brush. It wasn’t just that someone pissed on her, but it was Lindsey’s piss. She would have gotten up and pushed Lindsey if Sara wasn’t right there, watching. Tegan had no idea if the whole thing legitimately pleased Sara, or she was just playing hostess and granting complete use of the amenities.

The cold water carried the suds away and down the drain, the smell of urine gone. If only urine was like dirt or bike grease; once one could no longer see it, it was gone. But humiliation and subjugation couldn’t be scrubbed away with soap. Tegan could only bring herself to blame Lindsey; she couldn’t admit to herself that Sara was the one responsible for how she felt. For this reason, she promised herself she would stay for as long as Sara let her. She took a few deep breaths, regaining her composure, just as she heard Sara come into the bathroom.

“Is she completely rinsed off?” Sara asked.

Tegan turned to her, wiping the water out of her eyes.

“Almost… a few extra minutes in the water won’t hurt her,” Lindsey answered, her voice colder than the shower.

“Will you be joining us after this?” Sara placed the towels down on the toilet seat cover, turning to Lindsey, brushing her hair out of her face.

“No, I think I’ll just go home and wind down after all this excitement. Thanks for tonight, though. I really needed it after the past couple months,” Lindsey’s faint smile was frustratingly innocent. She looked like someone who’d been swamped with work going out clubbing for an evening. And then Sara kissed her. At least it wasn’t romantically, though, more like a comforting peck.

“Tegan, get out of the shower,” Sara instructed, her voice hard; void of the fondness she showed Lindsey. “Dry yourself off and clean up this bathroom. I’m going to call a cab and escort Lindsey downstairs. Any funny business and you’ll severely regret it.”

Tegan obeyed, shutting off the water. She turned to her sister, looking up from the floor. She had to be careful not to slip and get injured when coming out of the shower, especially since Lindsey had turned into a giant fucking sadist without Tegan’s knowledge. At least she was leaving, though. Tegan could take Sara, but she didn’t know if she could last another session with Lindsey. She watched the two women leave the bathroom, Sara shutting the door behind herself without so much as a glance back. If the bathroom could lock from the outside, Tegan had no doubt that Sara would have trapped her inside. But she didn’t mind that fact. In fact, she kind of liked it. So she patted herself dry, putting forth an effort to comb through her hair using her fingers before she pulled the cleaning products out from under the sink and scrubbed the tub clean, using the squeegee on the walls, getting it nice and neat, putting the bath and shower matts back in place. With that done, Tegan went to the mirror and fixed herself up. It didn’t matter how she looked, but it was nice to try. Since Sara still wasn’t back yet, Tegan knelt on the floor, waiting.

When the door finally swung open, Tegan perked up, seeing Sara alone, a hopeful smile etching itself into her features.

“Respect me,” Sara ordered, crossing her arms over her chest.

Tegan nodded, dropping to all fours to crawl forward until she was close enough to kiss Sara’s boot. She sat back on her heels, eyes traveling up her twin’s body, getting caught on the bulge in her pants, but nonetheless continuing until she met Sara’s eyes, filled with the familiar sadistic pleasure.

“Get up and follow me.” Sara turned on her heel and strode back down the hallway.

Tegan got to her feet and tailed Sara back to the living room, wondering what was next, now that it was just the two of them. She hoped the item in Sara’s pants meant what she almost didn’t even dare to imagine, lest she be wrong and ultimately disappointed. She stopped in her tracks when Sara stopped and leaned back against the rear of the couch, crossing her arms over her chest, staring down at Tegan. Even if her eyes were lower than Tegan’s, the look on her face made Tegan feel smaller.

“Are you wet?” Sara asked bluntly. She wasn’t even trying to speak in a sultry voice.

Tegan shrugged, unsure of how wet Sara wanted her to be. What if she wasn’t wet enough, and Sara got angry? Better to be safe than sorry.

There was a sigh and then Sara motioned Tegan to get down on her knees. For good measure, she kissed Sara’s boot yet again before moving back upright, watching as Sara unbuckled her belt, unbuttoned and unzipped her pants, pushing them and her underwear down until it freed a familiar black dildo. Its base had a nub made for clitoral stimulation of the wearer; Tegan knew from putting the harness on Sara so she could fuck others. This was one of the few dildos Sara ever touched Tegan with. She wasn’t the giving type when it came to the question of whether Tegan would receive any pleasure.

“Suck my cock with that whore mouth of yours,” Sara smirked, watching Tegan immediately take the head into her mouth, easing down the length. Sara had no qualms about pulling Tegan’s hair and making her deepthroat it, but she’d figured out that Tegan would race to try to prevent it after so many times, and even learned to disable her own gag reflex. After all, she wanted to please Sara.

Tegan wished she could get the entire phallus in her mouth, but she just couldn’t… It was just too big. Before Sara, Tegan hadn’t been used to more than a couple fingers inside her pussy at a time, but Sara seemed to enjoy putting large things inside Tegan, leaving all three of her holes sore.

Sara took hold of her hair, pulling Tegan’s head back until the silicon popped out from between her lips. “Stand up.” She reached over onto the couch, where the cardboard box filled with sex toys sat, plucking a roll of duct tape out, letting it slide over her hand and sit around her wrist like a bangle. “Open your mouth back up.”

This looked like Tegan was about to be gagged. Usually, Sara would just use an actual gag; either the O-ring or ball gag, but it looked like Sara wanted to rip the tape off her face.

“Lindsey gave me a parting gift to thank me for tonight.” Sara reached into her pocket and pulled out a pair of hot pink lace panties. She shoved them into Tegan’s face, covering her mouth and nose with them. They were soiled by Lindsey’s fluids, the scent invading Tegan’s senses, her eyes screaming for tears to shed. And then the panties no longer covered Tegan’s nose; instead, Sara shoved them in Tegan’s mouth. “Close it.” Once Tegan’s mouth was shut, Sara tore a strip of black duct tape off the role, roughly rubbing it into place. Apparently satisfied with her work, Sara tossed the roll to the ground. “Bend over the back of the couch.”

So Sara _was_ going to fuck her… Tegan couldn’t think of another reason she would get that command, anyway. And it was like Christmas had come early. She hopped up so her hips rested on the top, letting her feet hang off the floor, keeping her thighs apart, even while the blood rushed to her head. It would take too much energy to try to keep her back parallel to the floor, so she let her top half hang limp.

She stiffened, holding her breath when Sara took hold of her hip and the phallus, saliva already cool; especially when compared to Tegan’s heated entrance. Even if Lindsey temporarily killed Tegan’s mood in the bathroom, she still liked being humiliated and degraded. On top of that, Sara could put Tegan in the mood with a snap of the fingers or just a look. The blowjob Sara had Tegan give her only hyped her up, especially since it had been months since she last got fucked.

As always, Sara forwent gentleness, immediately starting to thrust once the toy was fully inside Tegan. Thankfully, the natural lubrication from Tegan’s cunt combined with her saliva on the cock helped it go in nicely. The pain from being stretched only fueled Tegan’s arousal and she kept her body relaxed for Sara’s use since she kept a harsh and rough rhythm, gripping Tegan’s hips for leverage, grunting in satisfaction. As she took Tegan from behind, Sara’s contact with her body aggravated the marks from where the belt struck. But Tegan wouldn’t lie… she loved the pain. Sara could hurt her as much as she wanted, and still, Tegan would be begging for more. She let herself get lost in the fucking, the pleasure building up inside of her.

Sara let out a groan, slamming her hips against Tegan’s ass as she came.

Tegan practically reared like a horse, her upper body lifting up with the little strength her abs held, realizing what was happening. She braced her hands against the couch cushions to stay up, letting out a pitiful moan as Sara stilled inside of her. She held her breath, not daring to move as her twin’s hands migrated up and around her torso, up to her breasts, taking them into her hands and squeezing them. Tegan couldn’t help but cry out (even through the panties and tape) when Sara’s assault concentrated on her nipples.

“I like these things…” Sara remarked… probably the nicest thing she said to Tegan all night. She pulled out, removing all contact from Tegan’s body.

It almost hurt, how close Tegan was. She whimpered, allowing herself to fall limp.

“Did you really think I’d purposefully make you cum?” Sara asked, her amusement like ice in Tegan’s stomach. “You’re dumber than I thought, Tegan. But either way, I want all of this cleaned up before you leave. The living room and the kitchen, since you already took care of the bathroom. Once you’re done with that, get out of here.” She reached around Tegan one last time, finding a corner of the tape, and uncaringly ripping it off.

Again, Tegan cried out. When it finally came off her face, Sara dropped the used tape onto the couch, leaving her with one last harsh slap to the ass.

Tegan’s heart sank and she took a few minutes to remain draped over the back of the couch after the door to Sara’s bedroom shut and the sound of a shower started. It reminded Tegan of what awaited her when she went home, giving her the motivation to get up and spit out the panties. She had to hold onto the top of the couch for a few seconds, after the headrush from finally standing upright. She’d deal with the situation between her legs later, if at all.

First order of business was to clean up all the toys; the ones in the kitchen and living room, and throw away the panties and used tape. Since the toys would more than likely be used on Tegan again, she cleaned them to the best of her ability and dried them off before putting them back in the box. After that, she took a Swiffer mop to the floor in first the living room, then the kitchen, washed the dishes on the coffee table, and finished off by putting away the plate of chocolates and the leftover wine. Sara hadn’t finished her shower yet. It was best to get dressed and leave before then, because if Tegan wasn’t gone by then, Sara would be angry and yell at her. Tegan didn’t even bother to try to clean herself up when putting on her clothes. Her jacket and pants held her phone, keys, and wallet, so the second she had her shoes on, she got out of there.

Tears rushed to Tegan’s eyes on the elevator ride downstairs, realizing what just happened. She was crying when she reached the ground floor. Thankfully she didn’t have to speak to anyone as she used her phone to request a Lyft. The only person she communicated with was her roommate, letting him know that she was leaving Sara’s building. She didn’t even speak to the driver, just nodded at them as she pulled her knees up to her chest, wrapping her arms around her legs. It was a futile attempt to hold back her tears, but her weakness was reserved for a certain group of people. She mumbled a thanks as she clambered out of the car when it pulled up in front of her building.

The driver didn’t wait for her to get inside, which was good for Tegan. She needed a moment. It was raining outside, which helped cool her off as she stood there in tears. Her body protested when she finally walked in. Some of it might improve when she went to bed, while the rest would only scream louder. She tried to get her tears under control but to no avail. Luckily, the elevator was empty, so it was just her, leaning into the corner, hiding her face from no one. She didn’t bother to wipe the tears away when the doors opened to her floor with a ding.

She opened the door to her apartment, slipping inside. She glanced up to see her roommate sitting at the breakfast bar on the other side of the counter. She didn’t even have to croak out a greeting, he just got up and came over to gather her in a hug she had to hold back a flinch from. But then she melted into it. When Jeremy hugged her, she felt safe. He was the only one she told about going to Sara’s. He never tried to tell her not to go; just took care of her when she came home hurting in more ways than one. Tegan would always be grateful for that since she knew things would have been a million times worse if she didn’t have him.

From the beginning, she’d told Jeremy about her feelings for Sara and he never judged her. When she felt cut off from her family because of the things she couldn’t tell them, she had Jeremy.

“Wait, wait!” Tegan pushed him away, and he immediately let go.

“What’s wrong, Teegs?” He asked, furrowing his eyebrows in concern.

“I…” The words got stuck in her throat, but she couldn’t just let him touch her when she was gross. “Lindsey was there and… And she pissed on me.” She admitted. A fresh wave of tears spilled down her cheeks.

“I don’t care about that.” He replied, gently pulling her back into another hug, where she wept into his shoulder. “I’m just glad you’re home. I drew a bath for you.” The way he always did.

When she was ready, Tegan let him guide her down the hall and into the bathroom, where a pile of clean and folded pajamas sat atop the toilet tank, a towel on the seat cover. The bath smelled of lavender Epsom salts and there was the bar of exfoliating shea butter soap in the holder in addition to Tegan’s regular shampoo and conditioner.

She’d been naked in front of him many times, so she just stripped down and slipped into the bath, laying back and closing her eyes while Jeremy poured water over her using a cup. Tegan’s tears finally ceased, and she was truly calm for the first time that night since she’d left in pursuit of Sara. Jeremy asked her to stay but didn’t push her when she declined, knowing the desperation in her eyes. But now he gently washed her body, taking care at the sensitive places. He didn’t react anymore when he saw the places she’d been hurt. Tegan felt bad about that, but it always made her feel worse when he winced on her behalf. It was like he agreed that she was pathetic. She knew she was, she just didn’t need to be reminded of it.

Jeremy didn’t actually need to wash her body but chose to wash the parts that were above the water as a comfort thing. After that, Tegan let herself be helped out of the tub and wrapped in a towel. Tegan zoned out until Jeremy handed her the stack of pajamas. She glanced into the mirror. She looked awful. At least he’d brushed her hair though.

That night, she slept in Jeremy’s bed, under a weighted blanket, clinging to him for comfort. Why did she keep going back? Why did she love someone who made her feel like this?

Immediately her mind went to the events inside Sara’s apartment… That was why. Sara didn’t care about her; just wanted to hurt her, to bend her until she broke, but Tegan liked it. She was addicted, and couldn’t stop. The cycle would start again, and Tegan couldn’t wait.

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry if the writing was off. I regularly had to stay up well past midnight so i would be just loopy enough to be able to write it because i was so ashamed of what i was writing. I've been scared to post this but... *sigh* if Matthew Dear can upload and be proud of Horses... I should be able to post this with no problem.


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